Tears and Pain
by shattered windows
Summary: Lily and James are broken in two by a dissolved marriage. When Lily is captured by Voldermort, will James be able to help her in time? And will they ever get together once more? LJ PLEASE R&R!
1. Forever

Tears and Pain  
Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own anything that is from the Harry Potter series.

* * *

Lily Evans looked out of the train. This would be her last time ever seeing Hogwarts again in the same way. The Graduation Ball had finished last night and she remembered everything so clearly. The taunts that were thrown at her, how bright the Gryffindor table looked like; everything. Suddenly she felt something touch her arm.  
  
She found herself lost in the eyes of James Potter, her boyfriend of 6 months. He was in a kneeling position and her eyes started clouding up.  
  
"Lily Evans, will you marry me?" he said in a hopeful tone. Her held up tears dropped and she whispered, "Yes James."

He grinned as he slid a beautiful ring that had a single emerald in the middle up her finger.

1½ years later

"JAMES! WHERE WERE YOU LAST NIGHT? YOU'RE NEVER HOME AT NIGHTS ANYMORE AND YOU KEEP ON SAYING THAT YOU HAVE TO 'WORK'! BUT I KNOW YOU'RE NOT WORKING AT THE AUROR OFFICE, BECAUSE I WENT THERE LAST NIGHT AND YOU WEREN'T THERE! TELL ME WHERE YOU WERE!" Lily screamed in my ear. I flinched as she yelled at me.  
  
I saw her breathe in and out, trying to control herself. It wasn't hard to see what I was doing. My clothes were all rumpled up and I smelled like sex. I knew I was gong to get hell for this. Quickly, I racked my brain for ideas.  
  
I meekly said, "uh....I was at Sirius's house playing Quidditch when-"  
  
She smirked, "James? I called Sirius. He said that you were out having fun. What fun were you having again?"  
  
Almost too quickly, I plastered my innocent smile and said, "I went to the Muggle Movies to see the new movie-"  
  
Lily raised her eyebrow saying, "Then how did your clothes get all messed up?"  
  
I looked around myself for help. It seemed as if I was trapped by my lies. Now I was going to be half-killed by my wife. Uhoh.

* * *

He muttered, "I was at Rita's house just talking when she started to hit on me." James blabbered on while my anger bubbled inside of me.  
  
Suddenly, I exploded. "JAMES HAROLD POTTER! YOU WERE CHEATING ON ME! YOU ARE THE WORST HUSBAND EVER!" I knew my voice was scratchy and my tears were starting to drip down my face. But I was furious and anyone normal could see that.  
  
I was so angry I didn't realize what I was doing. I started packing up all my clothes and belongings with my wand. Within a few minutes, it looked as if James lived alone. I never existed.  
  
As I stepped toward the door, I said calmly, "I'll send you the divorce letters tomorrow. GOOD NIGHT!" And I slammed the door. There was a huge crack, and then I was gone.

* * *

Running out of the house, I tried to find her, but she was gone, probably at Arabella Figg's house. My eyes tried to push back my tears, but I couldn't. I ran into the house and my tears trickled out of my hazel eyes. I'd lost my wife, my Lily. Forever.

* * *


	2. Shock

Tears and Pain

Chapter Two

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, but the only thing I do own is the plot. And by the way, please look at the Author's Note at the end.

* * *

My tears dropped as I ran down the street. I could hold them in any longer; James had hurt me so deeply. I didn't know where to run to, just anywhere but here. I decided to stay at the Leaky Cauldron until I could find myself an apartment or a house in a wizarding area. I apparated to at small wizarding restaurant near the Leaky Cauldron and ran through darkness. Tom was fast asleep on the counter so I shook him up in an attempt to wake him up.

"Huh? What's going on? Oh, hi Mrs. Potter. Do you need a room?" as he slowly recognized me.

"Yes please" I said impatiently

"How about this room for two-" he started, but I interrupted before he could finish.

"No, I need a room for one" I said with sadness growing largely in my face.

"Oh in that case, here's the key to room C9. It's up the stairs, and two doors to the left. Also, how long are you staying, Mrs. Potter?" He asked. "Uh...about 2-3 weeks if that's possible.

"That'll be 5 galleons and 4 sickles for the first two weeks please?" I handed Tom some of my money and walked upstairs to my room. It perfectly matched my mood; dark colors filled the room. Suddenly, I felt a wave of tiredness hit me and I fell asleep almost immediately.

* * *

I still couldn't believe Lily had left. Running into our house, I saw a letter on the table that Lily must have left. Still hoping that Lily hadn't really left and that she would come back any second now, I opened it.

_Dear James,_

_I can't really explain any of my emotions right now. I can't believe that you would cheat on me, but still, I can't trust you anymore. I loved you with everything I had but you had to destroy my love for you. All those girls you slept with, I knew about. Every single one of them broke my heart again and again._

_Now I just want to say that I loved you once before. But I will never be able to love again. Never do I want to feel this kind of pain again._

_Goodbye James,_

_Lily Evans_

Then I realized it was really the end. She didn't call herself Lily Potter like she had for the past year. She called herself, "Lily Evans". I really did break her heart. How will I ever be able to forgive myself?

Then, something heavy fell out of the envelope. My body started shaking with tears. Her beautiful ring that I had bought for her fell out of it.

My whole body shook with raw emotions. I couldn't control it any longer. Running upstairs to the bed I had just used, I cried myself to sleep, just like I did when my father died.

* * *

My eyes widened. The full blast of the morning sun flooded my emerald eyes. Quickly, I remembered yesterday, and tears threatened to drop. But I told my owl, Athena, to send the divorce papers to James's house. I quickly took a shower and dressed myself for work. As I ran downstairs, I avoided the stares and glances that were put my way until I saw the Daily Prophet.

"Lily and James Breakup!" My eyes scanned the page and suddenly my face reddened in rage. It was written by that idiot slut yesterday that caused all of this.

When I finally tore my eyes off it, I was ready to strangle that freaking Skeeter. Apparating to the Ministry of Magic, I lead myself in to the Auror Department where everybody's eyes were locked onto me. Ignoring everything that had stopped, I gave everyone a death glare before walking to my office.

When I got to my office, my feet just suddenly stopped moving. Sitting right on my desk was a letter. It was flipped to the back and it had Voldemort's seal on it. My vision blurred and suddenly everything went black.

**Authors Note**

Thank you to everyone who reviewed on the last chapter. It made me feel a lot more confident to finish this story. Do you guys think that this story is rated correctly?

THANK YOU ALL FOR REVIEWING!

And also, please press the ok button on the left area of your screen and press it! Any review will be thanked!


	3. Real

Tears and Pain

Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the wonderful J.K. Rowling.

* * *

When I woke up, my eyes were red and had some shadows that surrounding them. Suddenly, an owl dropped a large letter on my lap. I squinted and realized it was Lily's owl. Remembering what had happened last night, pain shot throughout my body. She couldn't be gone, I can't believe it! Lily wouldn't go!  
  
Yet my mind still told me, "It was your fault! You're the one who cheated on her!" I opened the letter and the divorce forms were right in front of me. She really wanted to divorce me.  
  
Just to clear my mind, I took a quick cold shower. Dressing up in my clothes, I suddenly remembered that Lily was in the same department as me. Maybe I could try to fix this mistake up there up there. My bewitched watch had just turned to "YOU'RE LATE FOR WORK!" Putting my robe on, I apparated to the Auror Department in the Ministry of Magic.  
  
But suddenly, I was stopped by a certain Rita Skeeter that looked quite pleased. She rubbed her hands up and down my chest and whispered, "Thanks for last night" in my ear in what she thought was seductive. 

I pulled her hands off me and hissed, "Thanks for ruining my life".

I didn't notice that she smiled right before I left and said almost to herself, "He'll be mine after today."

The instant I entered the room, shocked glances were shot at me.  
  
I wonder if they know what happened. Arabella Figg slammed a Daily Prophet in my face. The headlines seemed to yell at me, "Lily and James Breakup! It's all your fault!" Figg looked ready to kill me but others seemed to give me looks of pity. But at the bottom in fine print said,"Written by Rita Skeeter" So angry, I slammed down the paper, when I heard a scream from one of the offices. Running at my top speed, I somehow knew it was from Lily's office. I found Alice Longbottom, one of her closest friends, finding her on the floor, unconscious. Her soft red hair was disheveled and her green eyes were disturbed. I told her to take Lily to St. Mongos.  
  
That's when I saw the letter. It had Voldemort's seal on it and was a deep green. Slowly, I broke the seal and I was shocked by what I read:  
  
_Dear Mrs. Evans,  
  
I would like to invite you to join our Death Eater ranks. You would go very far and I offer you everything you would need. A loving husband, a paying job, and power beyond your dreams could be yours.  
  
If you decided to reject this invitation, you will be made whether you want to or not. Please return this invitation to me as soon as possible._

  
Chose Wisely,  
Lord Voldemort

  
  
My already pale face turned chalk white. Before I could do anything, the letter burned itself up and I sighed. At least Lily wouldn't have to worry about having Lord Voldemort wanting her. As I walked to her fireplace, I suddenly realized something that Lord Voldemort did: If he wanted someone, he would either get them or no one would have them. Pushing these thoughts to the back of my mind, I dropped some Floo Powder into the fireplace and yelled, "Saint Mongos!"

* * *

James brushed off the ash from his suit. Asking the person at the reception desk where Lily was, he walked up the stairs to the side and walked into the floor that Lily was currently in. When he found Lily his heart seemed to drop. Her face was quite pale and she looked very ill. He saw a male healer rummaging around with some potions. When he noticed James was there, he seemed to recognize him.  
  
The Healer said to him, "I see you've come to see her. I can't understand why she is unconscious. All I seem to know is that it wasn't a spell, but something shocked her to the point that she fainted. You seem like you know her quite well. Do you know what happened? Wait...you're the famous Auror, James Potter! Wow, it's a honor to meet you! "  
  
At these words, James's face fell and the Healer noticed."I heard that you decided to divorce Lily. Don't worry, I understand-"James exclaimed, "I didn't break up with her, she broke up with me!"  
  
The Healer said, "Well, that's what the Daily Prophet says. Do you want to read my copy? She won't be out for a day or so."  
  
It read:  
  
_Famous Auror, James Potter, has decided to divorce his wife, Lily Evans, of 1 ½ years because he found that Evans had been neglecting her marriage vows for the entire time of their marriage. The Daily Prophet has been asking many people about their reactions to this:  
  
Remus Lupin, a long friend of Potter, stated that he did not believe Evans would do such a thing and stated in a clear tone, "James would never divorce Lily for any reason. You must be mistaken." After this, Mr. Lupin refused to tell the Daily Prophet anymore known facts about this destroyed marriage.  
  
Narcissa Malfoy, the newly wedded wife of Lucius Malfoy, also friend of Evans said that, "I don't believe my old friend Lily would ever do that. If anything must have been wrong, Potter must have done it. Also, Lily has sent more than a few owls telling me of the happenings of their marriage."  
  
Pandora Patil, a past member of James's fan club at Hogwarts, smiled when she heard this news and told us this in a joyful tone, "Finally! James has gotten over that Lily and will finally be open for dates! I was wondering when he would open up his eyes and realize that Lily isn't everything to him like he always said in Hogwarts. And Lily will be left all alone, and hated by everyone!"  
  
Sirius Black, who is a famous Auror similar to his best friend, Mr. Potter, was enraged by this news. He yelled to us, "How could Lily do that to poor James? I trusted him with her but she hurt him so...so...BADLY! I'm going to kill her for doing this to my best friend!"  
  
Arabella Figg, a companion to Lily, was shocked by this. Her very words were, "When I get my hands on James! He's going to regret this very day that he did this! Oh...he's sooo dead! And for your wonderful audience, tell them that Lily would never do this and said that everything must have been Potters (she spat out his name) fault in everyway! He's lying!"  
  
Albus Dumbledore, Order of Merlin, First Class, etc., said, "My opinion of the result of this marriage is just that I am shocked. As headmaster of Hogwarts, I saw them everyday and how close they were. I will deny all the accusations against Mrs. Evans because my reasoning tells against it."  
  
Many of the people were shocked as how Mrs. Evans would do this. As a friend remarks, "She was a kind person, innocent in all ways. She wouldn't do this." This person requested to remain anonymous.  
  
Evidence has shown that Mrs. Evans has formally had other lovers which were name in her address book. Mr. Potter hasn't commented on any of this, while Mrs. Evans was seen storming out of the house.  
  
For more information, please turn to page 5.  
  
Written by: Rita Skeeter  
_  
James was angry yet shocked in everyway. Walking away, he went to the only person he knew that would understand. Sirius Black.  
  
Going toward a fireplace, he threw some powder in, and yelled, "18 Maple Street! 

"Suddenly he was hit by two hugs. Remus and Sirius were looking at him with pity filled in their eyes. He asked, "Do you guys know what happened?" Sirius said, "Ya, but I still can't believe Lily would do that."  
  
I looked at them with shock in my face. I couldn't believe that they actually believed the Daily Prophet. I explained to them all the real facts and at the end, they were looking quite angrily at me. "HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO LILY? HOW COULD YOU MAKE ME TELL LILY THAT SHE WAS A BITCH?" Sirus screamed.  
  
It took the whole night of scolding when I finally realized that this was more than a dream. It really happened.

* * *


	4. Traitor

Tears and Pain  
Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own anything that you recongnize from J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter series.

* * *

All I saw was a seal, and then my world went black. I didn't know where I was, but all I knew was that I felt so cold. My world was shaking from the shock of seeing something. I was scared about something that was going to happen in my future.

Before I knew it, I was staring into a bright sunrise and the doctor told me that I could leave St. Mongos.

So I was in St. Mongos. That would explain a lot of the things I saw around me. But one thing really that stuck out from waking up is that black flick of hair. I tried thinking back and I only remembered one thing that had that black of hair. Great. James visited me.

I can't remember what made me faint now. I'm looking back as far as I can, and all I can is darkness. It's bothering me, knowing that someone probably cast a spell on the thing that made me faint.

I'm not excited to see James or deal with him. I don't know if he'll act cold to me or try to beg for forgiveness. Either way, I will not bend to his will.

* * *

I woke up early before the sun was up and dragged myself out of bed. Hearing Remus's and Sirus's rants about how horrible I was wasn't really helping me get over the fact that Lily may never come back to our house again.

Taking a quick cold shower, I took out some nice robes and put them on. Then I went to the fireplace and threw in some Floo Powder. "Ministry of Magic: Auror Department" I yelled as I walked in. Brushing off the ash of my robes, I walked toward my office.  
  
Peeking into Lily's office, I saw that she wasn't out of St. Mongo's yet. I made a mental note to myself to check up on her later in the day.  
  
Entering my office, I dropped my mouth. Right on my desk was a pile of paperwork just yelling to be done. I sighed and began my long, long journey through the mountain of paperwork that surrounded my desk.  
  
At about noon, I went to our magical coffee machine and got myself some coffee. Suddenly, I was knocked into someone and barely stopped the coffee from spilling all over them. Looking at the person, I gasped to find Lily sprawled on the floor wearing an extremely stressed out look that sent me a message: Don't mess with me right now.  
  
Attempting to start some kind of conversation without a huge argument, I asked her, "So you got the mountain of paperwork too?" She nodded, giving me an angry look, and pulled herself from under me.  
  
"Yeah I got the work, so just leave me alone! I'm not in the mood to have a talk from you right now!" she yelled. Getting herself from the coffee machine, she promptly walked out of the room.  
  
"Well, that went well", I muttered to myself before leaving the now empty room.

* * *

God I hate that Potter! He always thinks he can still treat me like his old "girlfriends" in Hogwarts. He thinks that I'll just forgive him after cooling off, but now's different. I thought he'd changed in 7th year, but no, he still acts like an arrogant git!  
  
I got back into my office and started signing everywhere as well as filling out what seemed like thousands of forms that seemed to regrow. Suddenly, I heard a knock and I snapped in my angry voice, "Go away!" hoping to scare them off. I heard a loud, "Lily, open this door this instant! Come on! Here's a new mission for you and James. God! Lily! Open up the door already!"

When I didn't respond, Amos Diggory grumbled, "Fine. I'm just going to slide the folder underneath your door. If I don't get a note from you accepting this mission by 9 PM, you're going to regret ever closing the door to Amos Diggory."

I flipped through the folder and yanked my door open just to see Amos almost turning the corner to his office when I yelled, "Remind me why I need to work with my ex-husband on this mission?" He said with a grin, "Well, you two are only the best Aurors in the field and also, you and James will be our entertainment. Thanks!"  
  
"Well, then, I'm not going whether you need me or not. And don't use your puppy-dog face! I'M NOT GOING UNLESS POTTER ISN'T GOING!" I screamed, attracting looks from the hallway. Then Potter just had to open his door and add, "And I'm going only if Lily's going!" and shut his door after that delightful comment.  
  
I slammed open his door and yelled in his face, "SHUT UP POTTER! THIS ISN'T ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS!" and slammed his door shut so hard that it made a crack. I noticed that many of the other Aurors were sticking their heads out of their offices.

"STOP LOOKING HERE AND GET BACK TO WORK, YOU FUCKING IDIOTS!" and with that said, I made such a loud noise with my door that the ground shook.

Fuming, I let off what many people say my red-headed temper. I screamed into my pillow for 5 minutes before cooling off enough to start working on destroying the mountain of papers.

* * *

Stunned, I just couldn't help but start laughing. It was so funny watching her get so worked up, but I knew I had to get started on my work. Amos opened the door and asked, "Is she always like that?" By then, I was laughing so hard that my ribs were aching.  
  
Amos took this as a yes and closed my door. But first he handed some papers and told me to read it only at home. Starting on my pile of torture, I worked until I raised my head and saw it was 5.  
  
Packing up my things, I walked out the door and what I saw ruined my day. Lily was laughing with another man, which I've forgotten his name, and many men were looking at her with lust in their eyes. Giving everyone a death glare, I made my way toward the fireplace and yelled, "24 Siren Street!"

I got into my cozy house and got some dinner ready. Eating it quickly, I thought about how I was going to fix this. Suddenly, I remembered that Amos had given me the mission papers. I snorted.

_You will be invading the Malfoy Manor. Lily, who we understand knows Mrs. Malfoy well, will be a guest for a dance in a few weeks. DO NOT COME or they will find you!  
  
After this, Lily will ask to stay at her house with your breakup as the excuse and with some persuasion, Mrs. Malfoy will say yes. We will keep her there for about 6 months and she will investigate the Malfoy Manor.  
  
DO NOT TELL ANYONE OF THIS MISSION OTHER THAN AMOS DIGGORY, MAD-EYE MOODY, OR YOUR PARTNER. WE UNDERSTAND THAT THE NEW MINISTER OF MAGIC IS A GOOD FRIEND OF MR. MALFOY. He must not find out about this.  
  
We are risking our safety on this mission so you must not fail. You must work with Lily for this mission or else you will fail. She has some special gifts that Voldemort wants and he may be after her. _

_You will watch over her secretly. No one must know that you are there. If she is in danger, you have our full permission to reveal yourself.  
  
Again, THIS MISSION MUST NOT FAIL!  
_  
Snorting, I looked at the plans. They looked complicated but I knew that there were a lot of holes Lily and I had to fix. Maybe that was a time I could try to get Lily again during this time.  
  
As I walked out of the room to go to sleep, I didn't notice a shadow by my door as my old friend Peter walked out of. Sneering he said, "Master will enjoy this news." He copied the plans onto some parchment and apparated.

* * *


	5. Dungeon

Tears and Pain  
Chapter 4

Disclaimer: As usual, I would like to say...I do not own anything that you recognize from the Harry Potter series. I am not J.K. Rowling

* * *

I was walking to the shower when I remembered the envelope that Diggory gave me. Sighing, I knew what it was. A mission with James. I'd given up on the fact that I could escape this mission. Apparently, I had to do it. It seemed as if I had no choice. And besides, Diggory already had my answer from today.  
  
I opened it slowly and 3 papers fell out. I examined the papers until late at night, forgetting my shower. By then, all the papers were full of red marks in which I had corrected everything I could think of so I wouldn't have to work with Potter. If I already did everything that I thought, all Potter would have to do is just do his own, and I could get this idiotic mission over with. 

After taking my long-awaited shower, I fell into dreams about Voldemort trying to grab me away from James.  
  
I woke up late and hurriedly put on some nice robes. Grabbing some floo powder from a vase, I yelled, "Auror Department: Ministry of Magic!" As I entered, I was shocked by what looks I was getting. For days, I'd been given harsh looks from everyone, but today I was getting the strangest looks.  
  
Everyone around the room started giving me looks of sympathy rather than hateful looks. My blood turned to ice when I saw on the back of one of the Daily Prophets that a man was holding.  
  
The headlines declared, "_Muggle-Born Family of Famous Auror Killed!" _I ran to my office, praying that it wasn't mine. My hands were shaking as I gave some sickles to the owl, which dropped the Daily Prophet on my desk. It was mine.

Suddenly, I started shaking with tears. I cried my heart out and I couldn't believe it. Slowly, I read though it.

_Muggle-Born Family of Famous Auror Killed_

_Yesterday, Lily Evans-Potter's parents were killed by an attack from You-Know-Who. He left no evidence about why he killed the famous Auror's family. Many Aurors, such as world class Auror Mad-Eye Moody, fears for her life, as she may be targeted by You-Know-Who._

___  
  
On Saturday morning, July 6th, You-Know-Who entered the Evans's house only to kill both adults. However, Evans's sister survived the attack. When Daily Prophet reporters requested to ask her some questions, she ran screaming away. Some of the reporters believe that the sister had been tortured by You-Know-Who, and was insane. However, our experts reply that she had no damage in her mind. She will be released from St. Mongo's on Wednesday and have a memory charm will cast on her. _

_The walls of the house was covered in the parents's blood. However, what was most distinct was that in the kitchen, was the phrase, "Join Me", painted all over the walls and furniture. There was evidence of a struggle. _

_Is it possible that You-Know-Who is trying to get hold of this Auror? It's quite possible. The duo of James Potter and Lily Evans-Potter has been one of the most successful in capturing He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's servants, called Death Eaters. _

_  
  
Mr. Potter, her ex-husband, refuses an interview on this direct attack to Evans's family. _

For more information on their breakup, please turn to page 19.  
  
The door creaked open without a knock, and suddenly Mad-Eye Moody came in.  
  
He said in an almost sad whisper, "I'm sorry about what happened. It shouldn't have happened to you. But be warned, Voldemort (I flinched) may be after you. It's his behavior to do this to people before he kills them or uses it to force people into becoming a Death Eater. If anything happens, tell me and maybe we can get more information on his whereabouts. "  
  
My voice was frozen. How could he pretend to care so much? How could he be so, so fake? Nobody could understand what I was going through right now. My mind was completely frozen for what seemed like years. After a long silence, Moody closed the door so softly that I could barely hear it.  
  
I needed to talk to someone. Someone who cared for me. Someone who always was there for me. When I thought and thought, I only could remember one person. Narcissa Malfoy. She was always there for me to talk to and to cry on.  
  
I went to the fireplace and called out, "Malfoy Manor!"

As I came out of the fire, I gasped at what I saw. I was in a beautiful room, one that was made of marble. It radiated power, yet somehow made me feel cold inside. Before long, I was examining a portrait of some Malfoy ancestor when suddenly; I heard a loud, "LILY!" and following that was a bear hug.  
  
I turned around to see my old friend Narcissa. She looked exactly the same, just that she was wearing some much nicer robes then before. She invited me for tea as I sat down on a large couch, waiting.  
  
When she came back, she brought her new husband along with her. Lucius Malfoy. I remember how he always teased me about my muggleborn heritage. He gave me a look of disgust as he sat down on a chair as far away from me as possible.  
  
I was shocked the Narcissa brought Lucius with her. She knew that he hated me. She knew that in his mind, I was scum. But, she still brought him.  
  
We sat in silence when suddenly, Lucius said to Narcissa, "Narcissa, is it really necessary for _her_ to stay here? You know she can live on her own. The Mudblood doesn't have to stay here."  
  
Narcissa's glare was all the answer he needed. 

He turned to me in an unwilling manner and said, "Well, since it's clear that you don't have a house right now, you can stay at the Malfoy Manor. And it wasn't my idea. It was my wife's idea. Normally, I would never ask you this, but since Narcissa requested this, I will permit you to stay in the Malfoy Manor until you have a house."  
  
I was beyond stunned. This was Lucius, the mudblood hater. The Lucius Malfoy I knew in school would never have allowed me to stay at HIS house even if all the girls in Hogwarts begged him to! I couldn't bring myself to say anything until Narcissa asked "Lily? Are you going to stay with us or not?" I didn't know what to do.  
  
Number one: I'm an Auror. Aurors aren't supposed to stay at possible Death Eater homes. Number two: Lucius _hates_ me. Why on earth is he inviting me? And number three: How on earth am I able to stay here! _They know that I'm an Auror_. Something suddenly buzzed in my mind and I remembered the mission.  
  
I said in a controlled tone, "Thank you for asking and yes, if it is convenient for you, I would like to stay in the Malfoy Manor." Inside, I was afraid that I did something wrong, because both of them gave me looks of shock. Something told me that it was more than Narcissa's pleading that Lucius let me stay at his manor. Something much more. They answered, "Yes, yes, you may stay!"  
  
Lucius swept away quickly, but the instant he left, Narcissa jumped up and hugged me again. "Lily! I haven't seen you for such a long time! We have to catch up!" she said excitedly. And that we did. I told her everything that happened with James and me. She looked so mad that if Potter was there, she would've killed him. I don't know how Narcissa does it, but she can always make a person feel better.  
  
We talked for hours when suddenly, I saw the clock. It was 1 o' clock. Amos told us yesterday that we had to meet at my office at 12:30. Running to the fireplace, I said I had to go and threw some floo powder into the fireplace as I yelled, "Ministry of Magic: Auror Department: Lily's office.  
  
I landed with a loud thump, and I rose to my feet. Potter was there, looking bored yet depressed at the same time. He was looking as if he had one hour of sleep. His normally exciting eyes were dull and he had large bags under his eyes.  
  
Blushing slightly, I asked, "What are you doing here?" Apparently, he didn't notice I came in, so he jumped up. "Lily, I'm really sorry about what happened to your parents. I came to apologize about everything. I've thought about everything, and I realized I made a huge mistake. Please forgive me Lily!" he said in a sorrowful voice.  
  
Half of me wanted to forgive him while the other half of me refused to. Before long, we were in a heated (an understatement) argument about everything from the divorce to our job, when suddenly, James yelled, "If you're going to act like an immature brat, then I might as well leave!" and slammed the door shut.

I was furious at Lily. I tried to fix things up and then she started acting like, like...I don't know how to explain it! I sat down on a couch when suddenly I realized what I just did. I just ruined almost all my chances of getting back with her. The divorce papers on my desk seemed to be beckoning me saying, "Come on James! Just sign me and you'll get over Lily!"  
  
Ruffling my hair, I thought to myself in a voice similarly like Sirius, "How are you going to get yourself out of this one Prongs? Huh? The one girl you love hates you and you're acting like a mess!"  
  
Suddenly, the door creaked open, and Lily snapped, "James. I'm not here to say sorry, but I'm here to work on the mission. If this mission is going to work, we have to fix all of the plans. And this is not an "I'm so sorry" conversation. Do you understand?" Nodding my head, I showed her to a nice leather seat when she started silencing the entire room from the outside.  
  
We then got started. First we looked at Lily's papers and corrected them. Before long, the entire mission was ready. However, there was often a tense silence when the only sound you could hear was the scratching of a quill. It was beyond hard to work with a person when she only spoke when she had to.  
  
When I looked back at the procedures, I saw that she would have to go to the Malfoy Manor. Suddenly, I remembered Voldermort's letter. She was going to be in Death Eater territory! Who knows what they could do to her?  
  
First, we started a list of events that should happen in order. When I tried asking her about how we were going to get into the Malfoy Manor, she claimed that she already did.

I couldn't believe it. How could she be so stupid? What if they hurt her? They're Death Eaters for Merlin's sake! 

Someone knocked on the door breaking the silence. I opened it to find Diggory was standing outside. He looked around and slipped a piece of paper into my hand. Once inside, I read it.

_Mr. and Mrs. Lucius Malfoy would like to invite you to,_

_The Winter Ball at the Malfoy Manor._

_It will be on Sat. Dec. 11th at 7:00 PM._

_Dinner will be provided._

_Please dress accordingly._

There was nothing to say, so I handed it to Lily. After that, she nodded and made a move to leave. 

I looked at the clock to find that it said 6 PM. We both left in cold silence, and the memory of when we were friends almost made me flinch.

1 Week Later

Checking the mirror, I smiled at my reflection. I was beautiful. I was wearing a blood red silk dress. It was strapless with rubies sprinkled on the top. The dress hugged my curves as it came lower, and it became a full skirt. I was wearing stilettos. My makeup was the best I would ever make it. I was ready.

I walked down the Malfoy's marble staircase with all eyes fixed on me. Almost all the men stopped what they were doing to look at me. The women raised their eyebrows and you could literally hear them say "slut" to each other. I sat down at a small table, but before I could even get a drink, a man asked me to dance. This happened over again and again until I finally decided to stop dancing.

Sitting down, I looked around. I was surrounded by almost all Slytherins. I was probably the only Gryfindor that was there.  
  
Suddenly, a man sat next to me. I looked into the cold dark eyes of Serveus Snape. Sadly, I called back memories that made me flinch with regret. What had he done to the Marauders to cause him so many terrible memories in Hogwarts? I remember that I didn't stop them, and I truly felt regret for not stopping them.  
  
He said in a cold voice, "What are you doing here? It's dangerous for you to be here you know. But then again, Gryffindors are supposed to be _brave _and _stupid._"  
  
I raised my eyebrows questioningly and asked, "Why would you care for me? I thought Slytherins didn't care about Gryffindors. And I thought Slytherins were _rude_ and _evil._"  
  
He suddenly gave me a look that penetrated far deeply into my mind. Snape motioned for me to follow him to the gardens. When we were outside, he seemed more comfortable.  
  
We started up a conversation, first about Voldemort and the new risks of being an Auror until we landed upon our marriage. Strangely, it wasn't hard for me to speak with him.

As I awoke the next morning, I found that I was no longer in my bedchamber. The bright walls were replaced with cold dark ones. I was in the Malfoy Dungeons.

* * *

Author's Note

I'm so sorry for not updating sooner. I didn't have that much time so I couldn't write sooner.  
  
Thank you so much to everybody who reviewed! I don't know how to thank you all!  
  
_Confused in Life:Uh...thanx mandy...  
  
MegHarts: I agree. He should die after what he did to Lily and James.  
  
Tribal Leader: I'll try to make this story smoother. Was this chapter better? Ooohh...I'm going to make Lily almost a Death Eater in the next chapter! Thanx for the idea!  
  
amANDA: Thanx! That was a lot of "goods"...  
  
Indiangurl: Do you think this story is almost too dramatic? Yeah, I was thinking that Voldermort will "appear" in front of Lily during her stay at the Malfoy Manor._  
  
Oh yeah, and can someone show me how to make italics look like italics on fanfic? Thanks.  
  
However, I need some more ideas; all my ideas are starting to run out. Also, I need help on how long each chapter should be. Right now its like 3- 5 pages on word. Is that enough? If you can answer this, please tell me! AND PLEASE, PLEASE REVIEW!  
  
PLEASE REVIEW!!!!


	6. Late

Tears and Pain

Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything from the wonderful J.K. Rowling.**

**Authors Note: Ah. The long awaited chapter has finally come. Finally. **

* * *

_Where the hell am I?_

I seemed to be in a dark and damp jail cell, deep in the Malfoy dungeons. The only light that existed down here were torchlight in the hallways. I could see into the hallway, but really nothing else.

As I turned around, I smirked. The Malfoy Crest.

The cell appeared to be 10 ft. by 10 ft. Food and water were hidden in the corner. After I chomped on the stale food, I found a note hidden underneath it from Narcissa.

_Dear Lily, _

_I'm so sorry. Lucius made me do this and I couldn't tell you. I don't know what they plan to do to you since I'm not included in the Death Eater meetings. Since I'm in charge of making your food, don't fear any poisons in them._

_I'll try to tell you what's going on in the wizarding world in these notes. _

_Sincerely, _

_Narcissa_

I was so confused. Narcissa knew that letting me in the Malfoy Manor was just a trick, but she didn't _tell_ me? But the friend I knew would have told me it no matter what happened. Had Narcissa changed that much?

A more chilling thought occurred to me. _What could he do to her?_

Time passed slowly, giving me lots of time to think. Would be possible that Lucius would actually harm Narcissa? Would he beat her?

_That's not out of his character,_ I thought. A smirk grazed my lips. The hallways were so dimly lit at all times that I couldn't even tell if it was night or day. I heard no other noises, other than faint footsteps or dripping water.

The last Ministry report of the Malfoy Manor was shocking in its own way. The dungeons held more than a hundred cells in a few acres. If someone, such as me, were to get stuck down here, no one would be able to find us without being caught by one of the Malfoys.

For what seemed like days, I was given hardly any food and a note was always given underneath them. Sometimes I was urged to give Lucius all the "secret" notes that Narcissa gave to me just to spite her. My thoughts were getting darker and darker and I felt as if I would never be able to get out of this damp cell.

Was James even looking for me now? Does _anyone_ know I'm gone? Have they even noticed?

One day (or night, I was unsure), a man took me out of the cell. It seemed to be a relief to get out of there. But I feared what was to happen next.

* * *

"WHAT IN MERLIN'S NAME HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?" I screamed. After the ball, Lily had mysteriously disappeared, and _no one_ knew where she was. The guests at the ball that were on our side were questioned and the last time they'd seen her was going outside with Snape.

People were scattering around me. I was famous for my temper, almost as much as Lily's, which was part of the reason why we worked so well together.

Snape was no where to be seen, and I was so worked up I was willing to go anywhere to murder him. Sirius came and tried to tell me that Lily's going to be okay. But he didn't know that Lily was given that note by Voldemort. Great. So he's probably involved in this.

Why wouldn't I tell anybody about the letter? It's not as if he's going to kill me for telling anybody else.

I told Sirius later, and his reaction wasn't surprising. People these days feared others who were the target of Voldemort. It was obvious. Sirius first looked fearful and then understanding. People thought that he was a lazy playboy, but he did have his good side. Sometimes.

"Well, that makes sense." He finally said.

"Why?" I asked, already somewhat knowing the answer.

"It seems as if the Malfoys are just Voldemort's dog, biting only where he wants them to. (A/N: That line's from Wolfspeaker by Tamora Pierce. Do not sue me.) So he wants them, they bring her in. And it happened. Knowing him right now, he's probably putting the Dark Mark on her."

The Dark Mark idea had never occurred to me. And now I knew Lily wouldn't return the same. There was no way that we would save her in time.

It was time to take action.

Sirius was working with his partner (ironically, it was Figg) to find Snape and figure out happened exactly last night. And I was stuck working alone trying to figure out her position on one of our blueprints of the Malfoy Manor.

The map was very strange. Somehow, I was under the impression that it was incorrect. But that would have to be impossible because we stole it from the Manor. Neither of the Malfoys would have ever known that it was taken.

When I checked the dungeons, I knew that there had to be some kind of hex or curse on the blueprint to make it incorrect for others. It showed that there were only 5 small cells, when it was known throughout the wizarding world that they had hundreds.

Lily was always best at this kind of thing. I closed my eyes in agony. She was our best curse-breaker. No one ever beat her, and she always was willing to help. I missed her. I loved her. I needed her so badly.

No one could figure out the counter-curse. Maybe even Lily would have been stuck on this one. But there had to be one. Had to be.

When Sirius found a growling Snape, he saw the map hidden in my office and did a double-take. I noticed this and told him to come to my office after Sirius questioned him.

I sat in my comfy leather chair that…that…Lily bought me. Merlin. Will I ever stop thinking about her? I thought about what she would say.

_God James, this is one of the hardest ones I've ever seen. I don't think I can crack it. But wouldn't have Lucius made it for someone else other than him? We have to find those people. _

Suddenly, I jumped in my chair. I figured it out. _Lucius charmed it so only Death Eaters would be able to read it properly_. I started jumping around and laughing with people openly staring at me through my glass window.

Sirius came through the door clutching Snape so hard that his knuckles were dead pale. I looked at him, and half-screamed, "I figured it out!"

Instead of the happy reaction I expected, he looked more mournful.

"Snape over here, told us what happened. She's already received the Mark. It's all too late."

* * *

Author's Note

Oh my God. I know that it's a short chapter, but I can't write much. This story should end in….maybe two or three more chapters. It's not a long one because I have no commitments to stories.

**I finally updated Tears and Pain. OMFG. Sorry. I thought this story would forever be on hiatus, but it's not. **Don't expect the new chapter to come quickly. I'm still going through my intensely long writer's block.

I tried to revise the other chapters. If they don't make sense now, I'm sorry but they were just so horrible I couldn't stand it.

Hopefully this chapter will show up on the front-page this time.

PLEASE REVIEW!


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